Invisibility is my hidden talent.
of 30 votes, 37% like it
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My picture is worth well more than a thousand words.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
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What's missing from the fireworks displays is actual fire.
of 28 votes, 18% like it
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Wearing deodorant deprives you of your common scents.
of 35 votes, 34% like it
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A picture is worth a thousand millipictures.
of 53 votes, 49% like it
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Contrary to popular belief, nothing is contrary to popular belief
of 40 votes, 35% like it
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I think it'd be more fun to look for the hay in a needlestack.
of 48 votes, 29% like it
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I may seem insignificant now but I'll be back for the plot twist!
of 53 votes, 64% like it
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I spilled the beans but then they grew into a giant magical vine!
of 42 votes, 38% like it
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Holy deus ex machina!
of 40 votes, 33% like it
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My future is so bright it's making me squint.
of 61 votes, 59% like it
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Pushing the envelope is risky. Try pulling it instead.
of 52 votes, 46% like it
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Danger is my mother's maiden name.
of 75 votes, 77% like it
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Admitting you have a problem is the first step to low self-esteem
of 64 votes, 70% like it
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This is a play on words without a stage.
of 48 votes, 50% like it
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I'm rubber and you're glue; it bounces off me and you taste funny
of 48 votes, 38% like it
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Look on the bright side (it's easier to see over there, anyway.)
of 44 votes, 34% like it
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I put the Q in Peculiar!
of 50 votes, 44% like it
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You can't focus if your eyes are crossed.
of 36 votes, 44% like it
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This was much easier than dressing up.
of 28 votes, 39% like it
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Sticks and stones may break my bones, so let's not risk it, okay?
of 42 votes, 60% like it
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Star light, star bright, wish you were actually a UFO tonight...
of 37 votes, 43% like it
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SUSHI: That's how I roll.
of 49 votes, 61% like it
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SUSHI: It's how I roll.
of 48 votes, 63% like it
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When life gives you lemons, just eat them.
of 43 votes, 44% like it
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Destiny: It's in your future.
of 41 votes, 46% like it
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Just know that as soon as I get home I'm going to blog about this
of 40 votes, 43% like it
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Somewhere out there is somebody who looks like me but isn't.
of 34 votes, 29% like it
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Well, the grass on MY side of the fence is BLUE, so there!
of 42 votes, 40% like it
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I verb nouns!
of 34 votes, 35% like it
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(on back)
You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours.
of 37 votes, 27% like it
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You can't have your cake and eat it, too. Allow me!
of 37 votes, 27% like it
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When life gives me lemons, I eat them!
of 39 votes, 26% like it
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Actions speak louder than words, so this shirt is kinda pointless
of 41 votes, 46% like it
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On this shirt, the prepositions are few and far between.
of 48 votes, 35% like it
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Say things twice for emphasis. Say things twice for emphasis.
of 43 votes, 63% like it
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Success is 20% Inspiration and 90% Perspiration and 10% Mistakes!
of 45 votes, 42% like it
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Silence is Golden. Likewise, Gold is Silent.
of 49 votes, 35% like it
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I'm definitely not insane. But I might be in denial...
of 42 votes, 38% like it
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An appreciation of alliteration is an acquired aesthetic.
of 62 votes, 55% like it
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Please remove wearer before washing.
of 49 votes, 49% like it
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CAUTION: Do not iron shirt while wearing.
of 42 votes, 31% like it
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Let us talk excitedly about the weather!
of 46 votes, 35% like it
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If at first you don't succeed, pretend you didn't actually care.
of 56 votes, 59% like it
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If you can read this I guess my invisibility cloak isn't working.
of 45 votes, 33% like it
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<insert cliché>
of 63 votes, 29% like it
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It's not OCD, it's CDO. Put them in alphabetical order, you slob.
of 81 votes, 41% like it
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.rorrim a desu uoy fi neve esnes ekam t'ndluow sihT
of 79 votes, 29% like it
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Helium balloons are filled with high-pitched happiness!
of 80 votes, 39% like it
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The letter Z is used only once in this sentence.
of 75 votes, 28% like it
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Don't fart. You're causing global warming.
of 79 votes, 25% like it
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Cue the awkward silence.
of 85 votes, 35% like it
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YOU! Yes, you. I'm watching.
of 80 votes, 21% like it
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Appreciation of alliteration is an acquired aesthetic.
of 84 votes, 44% like it
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Now that I've taken over this body, I shall conquer the Earth!
of 83 votes, 30% like it
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Find a happy place, find a happy place, find a happy place...
of 81 votes, 23% like it
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Two wrongs don't make a right. But three rights make a left!
of 80 votes, 29% like it
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Look! Over there! A distraction!
of 79 votes, 29% like it
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When life gives you lemons... just eat them.
of 81 votes, 28% like it
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All generalizations are untrue.
of 79 votes, 27% like it
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I do my math homework in pen.
of 81 votes, 31% like it
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All the world's a stage. Please get off.
of 77 votes, 31% like it
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SMILE! It confuses people.
of 82 votes, 18% like it
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This was my third wish.
of 85 votes, 28% like it
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I cannot solve a Rubik's Cube.
of 84 votes, 25% like it
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Hyphenated words are super-awesome!
of 81 votes, 32% like it
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When life gives me lemons, I eat them.
of 83 votes, 23% like it
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10 out of 2 people are dyslexic.
of 80 votes, 26% like it
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A Clever Representation Of Names Yield Mnemonics
of 78 votes, 23% like it
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87.6% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
of 80 votes, 26% like it
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A Penny Saved is actually not worth very much at all.
of 80 votes, 25% like it
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C_NGR_TUL_TI_NS, Y_U'V_ S_LV_D TH_ PUZZL_
of 84 votes, 32% like it
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There is an elephant hidden on this shirt.
of 80 votes, 31% like it
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There is a hidden message here.
of 87 votes, 32% like it
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Don't judge a book by its cover. (unless it's a graphic novel!)
of 85 votes, 24% like it
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Two wrongs don't make a right. However, three rights make a left!
of 87 votes, 20% like it
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I've always wanted a shirt that says this.
of 69 votes, 30% like it
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My deepest darkest secret involves a plush hippo and maple syrup.
of 67 votes, 27% like it
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I like how the British say colours.
of 66 votes, 32% like it
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I've got a skeleton in the closet. He's gay.
of 75 votes, 37% like it
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Heaven has eternal life, but Hell has TV.
of 65 votes, 29% like it
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Ancient magicians used Abracadabacuses to count.
of 68 votes, 28% like it
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